This weekend

wow. This weekend was amazing. Me and Chels went to KC and saw Ashliegh-who isnt doing very well at the moment but she'll pull through with God. Anyways and we went to Jamie Varriano's B-Day party. Everyone was so surprised...because well Gregory knew chels was comming but not me and Shadow hadnt a clue so everything was great! (He saw chels and to hug her...threw his newly opened can of soda on the ground with a hiss...)And he even took chels on a motorcycle ride...they even kept me up late talking last night...i'm so tired. But chels is like glowing. haha
Anyways this whole Gregory thing is really starting to bug me...I mean I was talking to Livi yesterday (we went and got chinese). And so we're sitting in the resturant and she was like "you confuse me..you say you're better off and then your like depressed because he's not with you." And then we started talking about what happend which in my defense should have been done like 10 months ago... And I realized the only reason I broke up with him was because I was scared. I got to York with him and I just saw us there everyday and the major commitment...and I just...freaked out. And I thought well...we're probably gonna break up anyways because we keep fighting and I need him to be a man...so I'll just set him free and he'll come back...eventually. With all his life on him and experiences.and I guess I also felt I had to get out before he pulled the plug on me...which now I realize he would have never done. *sigh*
Oh well..it so doesnt matter anymore...he has Jamie and I'm here...alone without him.
Man...
Anyways I wanted to post a song that they sang at Jamie's party...Shadow sang it and did an amazing job I must say.
so here it is:
Softer to Me- Relient K

Where am I? Where are you?
There's so much time so little to do.
Were busy doing nothing cause its vanity we prize.
You can't see nothing cause you can't through your eyes.
There covered with a film, you'r blinded by yourself.
You're the one to blamebut you pretend it's someone else.

Chours:
Life could you be a little softer to me.
Life could you be more gentle to me.
Softer softersofter softer to me

I'm still alive. that much is true.
Never lied ,well, guess i've told a few.
There's nothing to see because i brought nothing to show.
The conversation got to deep, i shrug and tell you i don't know.
This life can get so hard,
this world can be so cruel, sometimes
I fall apart i feel just like a usless tool.
yeah.

Chours:
Life could you be a little softer to me.
Life could you be more gentel to me.
Yeah I know this is a selfish plea, because
Christ sacrificed his flesh on the cross for me.
But this world is hard, it's cruel and
I wish it could be ...softer softer softer softer to me.